Top ten things that sound dirty in golf but aren’t (- it’s just your dirty mind!)
10. Nuts… my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can’t get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke, but your follow through has a lot to be desired.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty in golf but isn’t:
1. Hold up… I need to wash my balls first.
Cartoon by Richard @ The Cartoon Studio. If you want to hire a cartoonist to draw golf cartoons or golf caricatures call Richard on +44 1246 209034
Here’s a piece I came across that inspired a cartoon.(Please excuse me as I have misplaced the site that I got it from – it was a couple of years ago!)
For instance, lets say your chip onto the green wasn’t at all what you had hoped for, and instead you have a very difficult long putt to make for par instead. Rather than rueing the bad chip shot which most people do, you instead project forward to the next shot, and mentally repeat an affirmation such as “perfect putt, perfect putt, perfect putt…” , over, and over, and over again in your mind while your partner is hitting his shot.
So whenever you hit a bad shot or feel a negative pattern developing, interrupt it with a string of positive affirmations, repeated over and over again until the negative thought has been vanquished forever. Ensure that you never allow negative thoughts to take a hold of your thinking on the course again
The second round the next day I made sure that I was focusing my energy in seeing the golf ball go into the hole. And sure enough, the next day I shot 71. I had 27 putts and missed six other ones. The funny thing about all this is that once I focused my energy on getting the ball in the hole it was amazing how my swing fell into place.
I dealt with bad ball striking by focusing my attention on getting the golf ball in the hole, no matter what.
I can do this.
I can achieve my goals.
I am completely in control of my game.
I will create positive energy around me.